Jump

I don't want you to get caught up in my mistakes. See, I feel like I'm about to jump off a cliff, and there's fog ahead of me, and I know how risky this is, 'cause I don't know what I'm jumping towards exactly. But I don't wanna stay waiting on that edge, because I'm bored of it! I'm so ready to just jump... and I'm waiting for myself to go... but I stay rooted in where I am nonetheless. And now this metaphor has gone beyond my control 'cause I have too many things on my mind to keep track of who is the cliff and who is the fog and why i can't jump.

I have to admit that before there is safety there is always the risk, but why am I so reluctant to take it now? Every time we speak I know this is what I want to be jumping to, but I can only hope that it's right. I've waited for the sake of morality, I've taken it slowly for the sake of evaluation. Now I have to see that the right thing for me would be to start learning how to drown again, rather than let the lake dry up.

Alone

One of my greatest fears since I was a kid, was to be alone. In any situation, I was okay, as long as there was someone there to be with me, support me, and to prove that I wasn't doing the wrong thing. When you're alone you're three thousand times more vulnerable, and there's a silence that you can't fix as you can around others. That silence can eat you up and make your inner mind start talking for you, which can be very necessary at times, and at others it can go on to the point of danger. I'm afraid to be alone, and be sitting there unable to override the sound of silence. To have no one to bring me down to reality when I start to imagine the best and believe the worst. And when I'm alone and I cry, I know that there's not gonna be a friend who can say their one word and make me smile.

Unsafety

A sense of unsafety

My own words on the attack

After a virtual sigh

Virtual silence.

These minds are screaming you see

Screaming in non verbal ways

These minds are wondering

Misunderstanding

As of that moment I was standing in space

Caught enegry dancing

But don't say a word

Cuz you say one more thing

And the energy explodes

Gone from it's encasement

Like three satisfying words

Suffocating in every way

A misty whirlwind in the middle of nowhere

And no where left to go

No more breathing now

Cling to every word

Until the storm abruptly stops

With one final message

Our ghost

Silent

Of all things to say, this is one of them, that I probably should. I usually do. But with so many problems concerning this one subject, who can i tell? I can only tell the people who don't care, or who won't get involved. Or have the sweet treasure of not having to. Benificiary One: He is of good and general approval including mine. Problem Ten Thousand: What if he knows or i cant do anything about it and its too good for me or if she finds out then she will be mad even though it has little to do with her it has a lot to do with her always because it's her personality and then my dear amica, she does not deserve for me to do this even though it wasn't my choice and what if that alone brings this all down?

Sorry about that. Love has returned to the Mounatin Spirit. Or Petrified Flower. However you address me online.

Fear

Fear represents insecurity in what is going on, and life is always insecure in the way that you never know what is going to happen exactly because life is life and it's not a set page, its constantly changing. Making it inconsistent and insecure. Since life is insecure, we should all be in a state of panic. Except for our ability to foresee, plan and adapt. We can foresee some of the many paths in life, and create scenarios that give us some percentage of knowledge of what might happen. Then, we plan. We take those scenarios, and we decide this is how you are going to react to all that happening, we plan a defense, so we feel stronger and prepared. And finally, when all this fails to give us a heads up on life, we adapt. We take what is thrown at us and bend around it in order to survive. 

Keeping in mind we have the power of those three abilities, we can reduce our fear by 20-60%, depending on who you are. Yet fear is always going to be there unless you know everything, which you simply can't - sorry.